Lately I’ve been catching my reflection and thinking… wow. I look good. And also… wait. When did that happen.
I’m in my late twenties. I feel grounded in a way I never did before, more comfortable in my skin, more certain of who I am, and at the exact same time, I’m lowkey freaking out. Like I'm aware that life is for real now. That time is moving. That I’ve lived enough to have stories, but not so much that I’m done becoming.
It’s a strange place to be honestly. Looking back and realizing how much you survived without even knowing you were being shaped. Looking forward and feeling excited because you finally trust yourself to handle what’s coming.
And somewhere in this in between, I’ve realized something else. As I approach my third decade, there are certain things I absolutely cannot go without anymore. I call them My Lifelines.
These are the things that keep me tethered to myself, to my peace, and to sanity.
A tinted lip butter and a brown lip liner.
Non negotiable. I don’t care how rushed I am or how low maintenance I claim to be. There is something about having my lips done just enough that makes me feel put together. And it has nothing to do with vanity either. It's like the equivalent of brushing my teeth in the morning, or an other version of making my bed before I leave the house.
My little sister.
Every girl needs a girl lifeline in her life. For me, it’s my sister. She grounds me in a way nothing else can. She reminds me who I am when I forget and who I’ve always been when life tries to harden me. Our bond feels ancestral, and sacred. She really is my twin flame and soulmate. I'm so grateful that don’t move through this world alone because she exists.
A pair of 4 inch stiletto heels.
And not for practicality. For sass and confidence. Heels change the way I carry myself. They remind me that I can take up space, that I can be seen, that I don’t need to apologize for being feminine and powerful at the same time. Even when on days I don’t wear them, knowing they’re there matters.
A simple skincare routine.
Listen, long gone are the days of twenty step routines and panic buying whatever TikTok swears will change my life. I need simplicity now. Clean skin. Consistency. Care. Washing my face at night feels like a small promise to my future self. Proof that I’m thinking ahead.
My journal.
This one saved me more times than I can count. When I don’t know what I feel, I write. When I feel everything at once, I write. It holds my unfiltered thoughts without judgment. It’s where I tell the truth before I’m ready to say it out loud. If I’ve learned anything, it’s that clarity comes after honesty.
A quiet morning.
I didn’t realize how important this was until I started protecting it. Even ten minutes without noise, without notifications, without demands. Silence is a luxury now. It sets the tone for how I show up in my life.
Money boundaries.
Not just having money, but respecting it. Understanding it. Not using spending as emotional regulation. Not feeling guilty for wanting stability. Peace of mind is expensive, but chaos costs more.
The ability to leave.
This might be the most important one. I need to know I can walk away. From conversations that drain me. From environments that feel wrong. From people who require me to abandon myself to stay. That exit door is my lifeline.
Laughter. Real laughter.
The kind that shows up as lines around your eyes and a moment where you forget to be cool. If I’m not laughing, something is off. Joy is no longer optional. It’s a requirement.
Getting older isn’t about losing beauty or freedom. It’s about refining what actually matters. It’s about knowing what you need to feel safe, soft, and alive, and refusing to live without it.
The laugh lines mean I’ve lived.
The lifelines will help me keep going.
And honestly, I’m excited for what’s next.
Happy 28th birthday to me!
Love you ladies,
Arlie x
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